October 10, 2013

Sunday Fun-Day

“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is to not stop questioning.”  
-Albert Einstein
(Remember: write a comment on yesterday's post (Give Away) with your best guess for my finish time Sunday and win a good book. Plus, it will make me feel loved :)
Me: I think it is time to get Gemmie back into physical activity at the barn. She has had enough time to settle in at the new barn. We have a 50 to prepare for!
Gem: I'm really enjoying getting out of work by pretending to be scared of everything. I hope this lasts! I have an early retirement to prepare for!
Me: Hi Gemmiecakes! It is a beautiful Sunday morning. The arena is dry and recently dragged (present tense: to drag the arena. Past tense: dragged? drug?) Let's get going!
Gem: Oh no!!! See you sucker! I'm outta here. *Runs to the very back of the pasture, flicking her tail in true horsey middle finger fashion*
Me: Hmmm...Gemmie is looking thinner. There isn't a whole lot of grass and I'm not sure she is getting enough hay. Maybe I need to talk to the BO about her nutrition. She can't perform well without proper nutrition. She may need more food. Poor girl. She is starving!
Gem: Hehehehehe
*BO shows up with morning grain. He proceeds to dump a "scoop" into a bucket for Gem and one for Pete. I say I will feed them it once we are done riding. I grab the bucket. I notice that the grain is 3 inches deep. I ask how much they are getting. I am told 6 pounds twice a day! That's 12 pounds!!! For a 900 pound horse!!!*
Me: Holy crap! Gem you are getting way too much food and here I was stressed out about you getting thin! *walks to barn shaking my head* Stand still! There are no monsters in the barn. You have been in numerous barns throughout your life. These crossties are the same as any other cross ties I have used with you over the years. Quit flinging poop everywhere! It is making a mess!!! Darn mare!
Gem: If I keep this up, maybe she will get so irritated, she will just walk around with me again. It worked last time....
Me: Ok. Finally we are tacked up. Lets go into the arena. Good. Lets start with a nice slow walk around the edge to warm up and relax a bit. No. I said walk. WALK! There. You know, you can get closer to the fence than 2 feet. Nothing is over there that will eat you. Fine. Walk in the center. The footing is deeper, so it is just harder on you. No, I said WALK. Walk. Walk. WALK. Ok...fine. Lets trot if you want to so bad. In a nice manner. Without being a giraffe. Why are you so jittery? You feel about to explode? Hmmm...are you in pain? No, I'm guessing it has something to do with the 12 pounds of food you are eating.
Gem: Its cool out. I'm feeling fine. I've got loads of energy. Lets make this more fun. Lets spice it up a bit. Ok...how do you buck again??? Head down. Check. Front legs stretched out and locked. Check. Butt up. Check. Now lift off!!! Ha! Take that!
Me: Um..Gem did you just buck? I think you got a whole inch off the ground. Good try though. Lets go back to working now, shall we?
Gem: What?! Don't make fun of me! This arena is big enough to fly in. Lets go!! *Takes off at a full on gallop around the arena. Cuts corner too short and almost falls to the ground. Gets very angry* Oh come on now. What was that. You are messing me up there lady with all your screaming and high pitched giggles. Shut up, I'm trying to concentrate. *Digs in even deeper and launches away to the gate*
Me: Are you finished yet Miss Thing? Obviously you don't need to settle in much more. You are feeling just fine. No. You can't finish on a brainless bolt. We need to get something done here. I don't care if you are all sweaty. Not my doing. Behave. Trot nicely twice around in each direction, next to the darn fence, and we can call it a day.
Gem: That's it? That's all I have to do. Ok.
Me: Finally. Thanks Gem. Good girl! Now you can go have your buffet of a breakfast.
And that was my Sunday Fun-Day.
(PS - go vote on my time!!!)

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